When I was in university, I had a few extremely talented classmates who have set out their ambitions to retire at age X (some says 30, some says 40). Since then, retirement seems to be this glorified life goal that everybody should aspire to – a picture of drinks on the white sandy beach with blue sky, freedom of doing anything anytime anywhere,…wonderful! That’s why I always joke with Eric that “my dream job is to have no job”. 😎 Well, Eric made my dream come true last year! For one year, I literally am in retirement life. How did it go?
Phase 1: Awesome!
The first few months were indeed very exciting. The long cross-country road trip was awesome! I was busy helping us relocate and settle in our new home. Everything is new, refreshing and interesting. The feeling of not needing to worry about things at work was really great! The freedom of deciding everyday where and how I want to spend my time every minute was excellent! I have caught up a lot of things that I wanted to do but never did because “no time” before…We have hit many extraordinary parks, mountains, lakes, beaches…And great fun with PJ on Kayaking!
Phase 2: Now what?
Few months later, things are settled, regular life rhythm kicked in. Days are busy but started to be filled with life routines – walk PJ, read books, learning online, exercise, laundry, cook, eat, watch TV/movies, sleep, then day in and day out, just like this. The question of “Now what?” starts to surface. Something is missing in life… perhaps a purpose? a passion? a calling? Something bigger than myself? All these questions start to cloud my mind…Also the human interactions with others are quite lacking, because most of the people I know are busy “in the wheel” and not many “have time” (just like I was before). Suddenly a huge loneliness starts to encroach me…
Phase 3: What if?
I started to search for meanings, what can I devote myself to that is bigger than myself? What if I go back into the wheel? What if I start my own things? What if I go get another degree? What if what if what if…? Lots of what ifs yet none of them seem to be particularly tempting…The mindmap of possibilities grown out of control… This is human, when presented too many options, people get anxious, and lost…And seating on the chair thinking hard is not getting me anywhere meaningful. At the same time, I did a lot of reflections on what’s important and what is not in life.
Phase 4: Start moving forward
I then read many books, listened to many podcasts, watched many Youtube motivational speeches, talking to many mentors and friends, and finally started to try and test some of the possibilities. Getting the day organized around taking small actions one at a time. Did quite a few online courses to understand what interests me and what is not. Start to create something, including this blog, even it is not great at start. Now I feel I am going somewhere, it is not yet very clear but I know I am going to get there as I am moving forward… Coach Randall used to tell us: “You can not steer a parked car!” now the car is moving!
I know this 1-year “retirement” experience is very unique to me, everybody is in different state-of-mind and have different interests and motivations. However there is one thing I can advice to those who are trying to get into retirement: “It might not be as glory as you imagined and try not to enter it if you haven’t thought about what you really want to do after you retire for 6 months!” Well, if you really want to do it anyway, no big deal either… Just like me, you will go through phases and find your way eventually…All the best to anybody who is on the journey of retirement!
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